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troopersmommy wrote:[ Plus, one that I'm worried about is (blasphemous statement from an animal mommy) my favorite baby for all times. There, I've said it. .

I don't think it's blasphemous at all; many of us have a "heart kitty" or "heart dog." My ancient MamaCat is mine; she's positively ancient, 20 or thereabouts, and she's the sweetest thing that ever walked. She doesn't swat anybody that doesn't need swatting, and she does it gently. I love her dearly, and every day is like icing on the cake.

i think its natural to have some we are closer to than others, nothing wrong about it at all. mom knows that when i go she will be devastated, more so than when most of the rest leave. some just manage to snuggle in closer to the heart.

purrrrrs

bendy

The trick is to make each one feel that THEY are the favorite and I am sure each of our babies is convinced of that. I am 62, had two brothers and TO THIS DAY, each of us KNOWS that we were mom's favorite. Love does that.

Thanks for the beautiful comments and for helping me feel okay about having a favorite. I love and have loved all my babies so much, so equally. And you're right Christine, each one of them is loved, lavished and spoiled endlessly, never lacking for tons of attention. The strange thing is that Fuzzy (aka Rabbit) is their favorite, too. That goes for my dogs, and my husband, too. Every day my old dachsy Rufus will scratch Fuzzy's bedroom door until I let him out. Then he'll nudge Fuzzy with his nose, and the two of them saunter down the hallway side by side like best buddies.Bendy, you really hit it on the head with the snuggling closer to our hearts.

When I was a little girl, my twin sister and I would tuck all our stuffed animals under the covers so they wouldn't be cold or alone. Fuzzy has a stuffed blue elephant named "Miss Elly" (now very old and ragged). He'll carry her from room to room visiting all of us and has done that since he was a 6 months old. No matter how old and ragged she gets, he still loves her and won't leave her behind. Every night he keeps all the kitties awake talking to her while he tucks her in his kitty bed before falling asleep with his head next to hers.Critters, your words

I love her dearly, and every day is like icing on the cake.

sum it up perfectly. Every day is like icing on the cake with my Fuzzy. And when the day comes that God gets him back, I'm really glad I have all of you to help put my pieces back together, cause I guarantee I will be a mess.

i just want to say that i am really touched that this thread is a sticky.

i also want to say that i 'get' it about having favourites.
the thing is...we DO have favourites, whether or not we acknowledge it.
that's not to say that we aren't loving everyone to the best of our capabilities....
but there are just certain souls that we resonate with on a different level.
example:
for me...i get kinda offended if someone refers to xena as my pet, and somewhat lesser offended if someone refers to her as my dog.
for me...the reality is that she was the longest and closest relationship of my life.
i loved her, and continue to love her, more than i do most people.
there was this indescribable deeper connection that transcended species, or power relationships (ie: the master/owner thing) and in my life so far...this relationship stands out from all the others.
this is not to say that i haven't loved well, and often.
it's just to say that there was a distinctly different connection with this soul that was xena.
i feel it's normal, and common, and healthy.
reciprocated or not...these kinds of connections are important and should always be honoured.

omg you totally described how I felt for my Mickey.
my first dog from a 3 mo old puppy to a 14 yr old senior.
he was my life! for 14 years EVERY DAY to have such a good soul, he was happy when he woke up together with me and happy all tru the day.
I goofed with him, we walked several times a day. I was no more than 2 hours away from home every day.
we were meant for each other!
why he had to leave so early, I don't know, he is missed EVERY SECOND of my life!
there will never be such a companion.
Wow you made me write this, thank you!

Puremutt, mickey is as much a part of our lives as our very own. And yes, I love some more than others DON'T TELL THEM! Thank goodness they can't read or operate a confuser!

maybe they can ! they are 'higher beings', remember?

Well said Tessa, well said.

Your words

there are just certain souls that we resonate with on a different level.

perfectly describe the relationship I have with my FuzzyRabbit. I agree that he is not just my cat, or pet, but a special "being" sent to me by God, probably when I needed him most, whether I knew I needed him or not. As I think back, I now realize he came into my life during one of the toughest times of my life - my husband (ex now) was diagnosed as mixed bipolar with rapid manic swings - a very scary time for all of us. Hmmm, Fuzzy stayed by my side through it all. He is my little soul mate. Thank goodness he loves my new husband John (can you believe it? ...I'm 53 and I just married my first highschool boyfriend on Sept 25...found each other again at 30 yr reunion 5 yrs ago) and vice versa. John gives him "love smuches" and lets him use his shoes for scratching pads.

The only other favorite was my German Sheperd Manny, my first rescue. I think I was sent to him by God in his greatest time of need. And oh, was he devoted. He was my best friend, my confidant, my counselor, my protector. He was with me 17 years and left...huh..., another realization just hit me. He left just before Fuzzy was born. Wow...this is the first time I've put it all together. Well, all I can say is, that God sure is doing a bang up job of taking care of all of us.

Before I fall asleep, I just wanted to ask how you are doing Tessa? Good, I hope. You and Xena have been on my mind all evening....

How are the chickens doing?

thanks for asking, trooper's mum.
i'm doing ok. have finally stopped crying every day....just so long as i don't let myself think about her for very long.
it's been 5 weeks.
the house is still so empty.

yes it still is here, after a year...
your routine is different as well, the things that were part of your day, the feeding/walking / playing.
the only comfort Tessa is that you did not leave before her, I could not imagine my dog surviving me, you understand what I mean?

puremutt, I surely do... I have made arrangements for allmy pups, and some are not adoptable.

Two nights before AllixMurderedPup died, I watched her sleep as I often did, and said out loud, "She'll have to be PTS when I die, she could never survive" never believing for an INSTANT that she would predecease me and only 2 days hence be shot and 3 days hence be dead.

It is the worst fear to worry about them after we are gone. Make your plans now! Is all I can say. I have two unadoptables. 3 that folks might take. Get their families lined up now and make your wishes known!

excuse my ignorance , what does PTS mean
also can you tell us what arrangments you made for unadoptables? these might be good tips were getting into now.

I'm glad Tessa. I know it's not easy, never is. But somehow, some way life goes on. My best friend Lupe lost her oldest son to a ruptured brain aneurysm...out of the blue 8 yrs ago this month. He was only 23 yrs old. One minute she was talking to him while he fed his fish, the next minute he grabbed his head and fell unconscious. He'd never had a symptom or any warning prior to that. The hardest part was making the decision to let him go after he'd been in a coma for a wk with no brain activity. She didn't think she could breathe, much less live after that....

Last week we went to the cemetary and decorated it for Halloween/Thanksgiving. For years we went every week. Now it's every holiday. She still cries, but more because she realized how long it has been. I think she still feels guilty that he died instead of her (she's a 12 yr breast cancer survivor). She has three other children who've given her four grandchildren and another on the way. They've helped more than anything.

I told her about you Tessa, and she understood and sympathized. That's why she's my best friend. I've never had kids, but she understands the depth of feelings for a loss whether human or not, and never judges. Strangely enough, she is afraid of dogs and cats. We're kind of an odd pair. I told her about the candles for Xena, and I lit one for her son after I lit one for Xena. She thought they were beautiful.



Hang in there, Troopers "Mum" (I really like that)